Happy Thanksgiving!

It’s been a while since I have posted on here other than the post about my best friend but I am going to do my best to keep people be it few or many updated on the major events going on in my life. Thanksgiving is almost upon us and it has really gotten me thinking about the things in my life that I am thankful for. I have had many unfortunate events in my life and just about everything bad that could happen to someone during their lifetime has happened at least once to me so I do not take anything for granted. With the beginning of the year being one of the worst of my life I thought it would be at least till 2010 till things started turning around and becoming better for me but it seems that as fall came along so did all the good in my life.



Great things started happening a bit sooner but have since only been better and are now accompanied by several other things that I now have to be thankful for. I have made a list of the larger things that I have to be thankful for but in no way is this list complete nor does it give enough credit where it is due.

A few of the many things that I am thankful for:

• Having a job, in a time when so many people are loosing their houses, cars and families I am just thankful to have a place where I can go to get money for the essentials. I have lost my car among many other things due to the economy these days and instead of being bitter I am just thankful that I now have the means.

• A place to live, Katie has taken me in as the last roommate she will ever have and given me a killer deal on a room to rent and been very understanding when I might be a little late on rent. She took me in before my room was ready and gave me a place to stay as well as being there to listen and give good advice when I need it. If I did not live here I would have lived by myself in a crappy studio where I very well could have become a super depressed hermit.

• The best girlfriend a guy could have, Kayla supports me in the things that I do and not only elevates my mood but gives me confidence and self worth that I could not find anywhere else. She brought light into my life and taught me to feel many feelings I had felt I would never feel again. She and her family make me feel loved and included and are just all around good people. I am so grateful for all the welcome change that Kayla brings.

• My health, one thing that is not guaranteed us is health. Health is one of the one things most taken for granted by people these days. Just ask any sick person who has cancer or any other disease and they will tell you how greatly their quality of life has been affected by that. I have my fair share of health issues but I could not be more thankful that I am healthy enough to stand on my own and live a normal life that is not hindered (yet anyway) in any way by health problems.

• My family, Though I do not care for 95% of my family there are a few aunts, uncles and cousins that are here for me and I am thankful for their support. I love my siblings with all my heart and though I do not tell them they know how I feel by my actions. I may not live close to them but I do enjoy every conversation that I share with them, ever minute spent with them. They have been here for me the best they could be when I really need it and they know that they can call on me at any moment and I would be there for them.

Music

Ok so this blog has turned out to be anything but what I had hoped it would be. I will be picking it back up and running with it if all goes as planned.

Music is my life, I know everyone says that but in all honestly it is the vein of my existence. Music for me is what an IV is to a sick patient. I have been fully engulfed in music for the bulk of my life and it really has benefited my life. I have found that the music that I listen to defines my mood, life and who I am.

I only recently related the connection in my everyday life after thinking about the last year of my life. When I was writing full time it literally sucked up my entire life and I never got a chance to actually listen to music. By December my long term engagement has totally fallen apart and from that moment till now it has been getting worse and worse. We broke up and since have moved away from each other almost becoming strangers if it were not for the extremely close emotional bond that for some reason will never go away.

I kept falling as I was jobless and homeless, struggling doing whatever it took just to eat. Luckily for me my cousin gave me a place to stay for a few weeks. I kept sinking lower and lower due to the situation and the actions of others. During the week that I found my headphones I started turning around emotionally and getting back up.

It seems all my confidence and drive was in my music, I was at the end of my rope just wanting to end it all and my music got me from that point to having an unimaginable job for myself and getting a place to live with some amazing people. Music was without a doubt the defining turning point that took my life from as bad as it gets to better than I have ever been on my own.

Music gives me the huge confidence that I need to fulfill my promise and do amazing things. Without it I am nothing and a failure; I am emotionally unstable and a total wreck. With it I am unstoppable.